Transcript

One of the biggest hurdles for me, honestly, to accept and to understand when I was discerning whether or not I was going to become Catholic was the sacrament of confession.

I didn't really understand why we had to qu- quote, unquote, confess our sins to a priest, when we could just do it directly to God in the convenience and the privacy of our own home.

Um, and then I realized, first of all, the sacrament of confession, when Jesus instituted it, it's right there in scripture.

And secondly, in this world that we live in now where everyone is, is, you know, so eager and so willing to go to a therapist or go to a psychologist to discuss any problems they may be having personally or, or mentally, why What, what's the holdup?

What's the hurdle?

Why, why can't we also do the same in our spiritual life?

As a Protestant, we're told to confess our sins to one another.

And if you really need to talk to someone, you can.

You can go to your pastor, or you can go to a counselor, or you could go to a friend.

Or you can just go to God, privately, just between you and, and Jesus.

Um, I only went to a pastor twice in my entire Protestant life.

I never went to a friend.

And, um, of course, never went to a priest.

So mostly, I went directly to God to ask for forgiveness.

But in my experience, because we don't have the sacrament of confession, there really is no way to really discharge the sins out of your, your life.

There's no way to really wipe the slate clean.

Even though you know in your mind that God has forgiven you, something is still, once again, something is missing that I think we need deep in our heart and in our, in our soul.

I was terrified at the prospect of my first confession.

I thought, How will I do this?

I've been alive for 30-something years.

The sins I've committed, the brokenness in my heart, my soul, my mind, how can I possibly do this?

And yet, I, I knew I had to, and I'd been told that it was a healthy thing, it was a life-giving thing.

And so I approached it with much fear and trembling.

And I had a wonderful confessor, a priest who was leading our RCIA class, who made it a beautiful, life-transforming experience for me.

But what I began to find out was that as difficult as it might be to have to say these things aloud, and to say them to another human being, that it was precisely that difficult thing that made the sin real to me in a whole new way.

And therefore, prompted me to pull away from it, to turn away from it, to see it for what it is.

To see it in all its horror, its ugliness, its sterility, its barrenness.

And to be able to get a grip on sin that I didn't have before that said, Oh, this is something I don't want in my life.

And so confession had a way of, of making real to me the substance, the horror, of sin in such a way that it brought me more and more, still does, with all my sins, still does bring me more and more, to want to run away from sin and to run right into the arms of my Father.

When I was preparing to enter the Church, I was told by the priest leading my RCIA class that I would have to make a general confession, confess all the sins of, of my life.

Of course, I was scared and, and really nervous to do so.

But when I got into the confessional and began to pour out my sins to the priest, I felt great peace and, and even joy overcoming me.

And I was hooked.

After that first experience of confession, I realized what a great sacrament this is, and the, and the wonderful relief that it gives to a soul who's truly sorry for his or her sins.

And since that time, I've been a regular, going to confession, uh, every week or two weeks, or at least monthly.

One of my favorite duties as a priest is to hear the first confessions of children.

And it never ceases to amaze me how little kids will walk into the confessional nervous and sometimes even crying, but then when that confession is over, they will bound out of the confessional with great joy.

Their souls are responding to the grace that they've just received.

And that's what confession does for us.

It takes away our sins, but it gives us great joy in its place.

I think when God instituted this sacrament, when Jesus instituted the sacrament of confession, he knew that we as humans needed to say our sins out loud.

We needed to have, um, a priest that he put here for us to give us spiritual direction.

When we go to confession, it's not only just, just a cleansing of our soul.

It's not only saying our, our sins out loud.

It's not only the forgiveness of sins.

But that priest there, um, in a very special way, uh, in a, in a mystery, a sacramental mystery that we might not quite understand, I believe Jesus gives him the ability to grant us graces that are also going to help us, um, going forward in not committing the sins that we, we may be a, a little, um, you know, uh, t- geared towards, um, committing, whatever our own personal struggles may be.

So, um, in I haven't made my first confession yet, but we learned about it in RCIA. And my understanding of it is that it is a sacrament of healing.

And how much we see what sin did to Jesus on the cross, what sin did to his body, but what does it do to us?

What does it do to our souls?

And how does just a little do-it-yourself confession, whether it's, you know, with, with God, or a friend, or a counselor, how does that really deal with the sin in the way that is, is needed, that we need for that healing?

So, I'm really looking forward to going to confession.

Of course, I'm a little uptight about it, but I, what I hear, uh, from other Catholics when they talk about the joy and the peace that they have when they come out of the confessional, I know that at this point in my life, I, I just can't wait to go to confession.